- Satan: [appears]
- Satan: You can have anything you wan--
- Me: LANGUAGE.
- Satan: What?
- Me: GIVE ME EVERY LANGUAGE.
- Satan: What the--?
- Me: YOU SAID ANYTHING. GIVE ME EVERY LANGUAGE IN THE WORLD.
- Satan: Wouldn't you rather have love or money?
- Me: EVERY. LANGUAGE. MASTERY OF EVERY LANGUAGE. NOW.
once upon a time, i was in an honors english class as a sophomore in high school, and we covered the great gatsby
and once a day, every day, one young man would say, in the exact same inquisitive tone of wonder,
"wait a minute! is nick gay for gatsby?"
until finally, one day, our teacher shouted, “YES NICK IS GAY FOR GATSBY BUT I CAN’T TEACH YOU THAT BECAUSE THIS IS A CATHOLIC SCHOOL.”
all you need to know about the star trek fandom is that one time i made a joke post about butt dialing on command consoles on starfleet spaceships cause jim kirk likes to sit on everything that isn’t a chair and it generated a massive reblog chain with folks seriously discussing the future technology of command consoles and outlining the scientific developments necessary to prevent butt dialing from happening